Self-Love Without Condition

Photo by Deun Ivory

Photo by Deun Ivory















A wave of inspiration came through a newsletter from Lauren Ash that landed in my inbox this morning and really resonated with me. It spoke to radical self-love and accepting oneself wholly. Without condition.

She talked about the concept of what it means to love yourself unconditionally, meaning, not only when you adhere to the standards you have set for yourself or when you are feeling accomplished about your endless list of tasks.

To also love yourself in the moments when you feel fear, sadness, lonely, angry, guilty, and other inharmonious expressions of ourselves. To be able to grant yourself a moment to tend and care for those parts too, with as much love and enthusiasm that you show yourself when you’re feeling vibrant. That is what unconditional love looks like.

The email included a free presence guided meditation on Soundcloud that I thought you all would love. In it, she poses the following questions, which I took some time to journal on afterwards and wanted to share.

One of the biggest things I felt shift my energy in this meditation was her cue to let go of the need to make sense of what I experienced or felt during the meditation. I could feel my whole body relax and felt a sense of stillness and peace flow through me. To be able to observe and be aware of something without the immediate need to understand it or take action, felt absolutely freeing.

She posed three questions that I journaled on and here’s what surfaced.

1.     What does my highest self feel like?


When I feel my higher self there is not one rushed bone in my body and my mind is present. I feel empty and completely full at the same time. I move with grace, being mindful not to hurt myself (bump into things, which I’m notorious for) and focus on one task at a time.

I am in tune with my higher self and divinely guided all day long.

2.     What does my most authentic life look like?

Just last night I was talking to my boyfriend about how in my past relationships I often felt like I was walking on eggshells — that being the complete and free-spirited version of myself wouldn’t be as regarded as the tamed version. In the end, I sacrificed and gave so much to make it work. Realizing last night that the reason I had to sacrifice so much of myself was because true compatibility never existed.

I experience the things I love to do without fear of the reactions of others. 

Being unapologetic.

Specifically about how I’m feeling in a given moment, that my emotions and feelings are valid and yet don’t need validation from others. 

Being unapologetic about how I spend my time. Realizing that my schedule and how I organize my time is my right, and something I’ve worked hard to create. Taking the luxury of several hours or a whole ass day to do nothing without guilt that others can’t do the same or that this action might be seen as wasteful of time.

I reclaim my time and use it to heal and nourish me.

Not people pleasing, rather supporting my own pleasure in life. Such as eating well and intuitively, not allowing the needs of others to overshadow my own. Prioritizing my needs without accommodating the needs others. Setting boundaries that center around what I need. 

Not shortchanging myself of experiences or desires I want to have.

Living in the ways that make me feel happy and free. Solo traveling and exploring (without guilt), writing, reading, enjoying a meal with a friend.

3.     What does living from my truth look like?

Living a spiritually led life. Meditating and moving from guidance and wisdom received in meditation, from my higher self and spiritual guidance of ancestors and spirit guides.

I give myself time each day to nourish my spiritual self.

Speaking from a place of love but being honest about feelings.  

Honoring and tending to how I find myself in a given moment, using awareness instead of automation to move through my day. 

I encourage you to check out this meditation sometime this weekend and check in with yourself on these very important questions. Take some time to journal, feel and tap into your center.

With infinite love, light and blessings.

Namaste ya’ll — Angie

PauseAngie FranklinComment